tuesday blues and greys
- out early on the lop-sided track, beating the ongoing heat, I realized I was missing walking with my wife. My all-time favorite walking-with-human. They say we don’t regret the past – I don’t know.
- yesterday it reached 114, they predict 97 today, like some cold front’s gone through, people looking forward to 97. Life’s kind of relative at times.
- i’m doing things and thinking about doing things and planning to do things here around Kate’s house which bear the flavor of leaving. As in here is coming a big, big ending.
- last night it was decided, between Gavin and me, I’d spend Friday night in Oakland, with him, two fabulous gifts and blessings….Gavin….Oakland. Who knows when I’ll get there, I was just writing route directions and specifics, it’s 10 hours or so, maybe only four turns between Kate’s house and Gavin’s house. I’ll miss the early walk here, get going early and all that, I’m hoping me and Gavin can get a walk in down Telegraph or some other sacred street.
- also, amidst the world of maps and wicked far distances and likely being really tired by then I was googling whether it will be better to stay on the 5 straight through LA to Encinintas or swerve over toward the coast and get on the 405 on the westside and take it all the way to where it re-joins the 5, down in Irvine, where I crashed at the University back in the summer and fall of ’82 with my high school pal Nicky and his wife in grad housing and couch-surfed a while and did pretty cool and fun things down in San Clemente, and if there are no big bumps and hiccups I’ll be cruising through San Clemente sometime Saturday afternoon, continuing on into this unexpected and shimmering new door thrown open in my life.
- and talk about San Clemente, there’s a guy who works at my favorite Trader Joe’s in the world, in Portland, who’s from San Clemente and he was always friendly and especially kind to my son Spenser, makes me like San Clemente more, and I spent a bunch of afternoons running on the high school track in San Clemente and nearly drowned at the beach there once after a shift at MacDonald’s, but didn’t, and I have already determined and decided and vowed to myself that once I’m settled into and just another everyday cat from Encinitas I’m going to jump on the 5 north some day and drive up to San Clemente, it’s 34.7 miles, and do some of my old San Clemente things as a kind of honoring to and for this long bountiful quite often interesting life I’ve been given so far.
- today’s a Spenser day, my last time with him for two-three months, and he was throwing up from the heat last night, I learned late, and I’m sure hoping he’s back to his usual cool self today. I’m aiming for my best dad self.
- my gratitude level for everyone who has helped me arrive at this very spot this very today morning is high. It’s real high.
- i’m saying “thanks” a lot – and digging it.